Posts tagged ‘Christmas’

Happy Holiday 2012

I wish you a day of ordinary miracles.Holiday Cheer

A fresh pot of coffee you didn’t have to make yourself.

An unexpected phone call from an old friend.

Green stoplights on your way to work or shopping.

I wish you a day of little things to rejoice in.

The fastest line at the grocery store.

A good sing-along song on the radio.

Your keys right where you look.

I wish you a day of happiness and perfection –

Little bite-size pieces of perfection that give you a wonderful feeling.

I wish you Peace, Happiness and Joy.

 

Judith

‘Twas Assembly Before Christmas

Christmas gifts.

Image via Wikipedia

Dedicated to parents (and all other adults)

‘Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house
I searched for the tools to hand to my spouse.
Instructions were studied and we were inspired,
In hopes we could manage “Some Assembly Required.”

The children were quiet (not asleep) in their beds,
While Dad and I faced the evening with dread:
A kitchen, two bikes, Barbie’s town house to boot!
And, thanks to Grandpa, a train with a toot!

We opened the boxes, my heart skipped a beat…
Let no parts be missing or parts incomplete!
Too late for last-minute returns or replacement;
If we can’t get it right, it goes in the basement!

When what to my worrying eyes should appear,
But 50 sheets of directions, concise, but not clear,
With each part numbered and every slot named,
So if we failed, only we could be blamed.

More rapid than eagles the parts then fell out,
All over the carpet they were scattered about.
“Now bolt it! Now twist it! Attach it right there!
Slide on the seats, and staple the stair!

Hammer the shelves, and nail to the stand.”
“Honey,” said hubby, “you just glued my hand.”
And then in a twinkling, I knew for a fact
That all the toy dealers had indeed made a pact

To keep parents busy all Christmas Eve night
With “assembly required” till morning’s first light.
We spoke not a word, but kept bent at our work,
Till our eyes, they went bleary; our fingers all hurt.

The coffee went cold and the night, it wore thin
Before we attached the last rod and last pin.
Then laying the tools away in the chest,
We fell into bed for a well-deserved rest.

But I said to my husband just before I passed out,
“This will be the best Christmas, without any doubt.
Tomorrow we’ll cheer, let the holiday ring,
And not have to run to the store for a thing!

We did it! We did it! The toys are all set
For the perfect, most perfect, Christmas, I bet!”
Then off to dreamland and sweet repose I gratefully went,
Though I suppose there’s something to say for those self-deluded;

I’d forgotten that batteries are never included!

Merry Christmas Everyone!

A Lawyer’s Night Before Christmas

A&P, COFFEE, SANTA CLAUS

Image by George Eastman House via Flickr

A Lawyer’s Night Before Christmas – with deepest apologies to Clement Moore,

Whereas, on or about the night prior to Christmas, there did occur at a certain improved piece of real property (hereinafter “the House”) a general lack of stirring by all creatures therein, including, but not limited to a mouse.

A variety of foot apparel, e.g. stocking, socks, etc., had been affixed by and around the chimney in said House in the hope and/or belief that St. Nick a/k/a/ St. Nicholas a/k/a/ Santa Claus hereinafter (“Claus”) would arrive at sometime thereafter.

The minor residents, i.e. the children, of the aforementioned House, were located in their individual beds and were engaged in nocturnal hallucinations, i.e. dreams, wherein vision of confectionery treats, including, but not limited to, candies, nuts and/or sugar plums, did dance, cavort and otherwise appear in said dreams.

Whereupon the party of the first part (sometimes hereinafter referred to as “I”), being the joint-owner in fee simple of the House with the party of the second part (hereinafter “Mamma”), and said Mamma had retired for a sustained period of sleep. (At such time, the parties were clad in various forms of headgear, e.g. kerchief and cap.)

Suddenly, and without prior notice or warning, there did occur upon the unimproved real property adjacent and appurtenant to said House, i.e. the lawn, a certain disruption of unknown nature, cause and/or circumstance.

The party of the first part did immediately rush to a window in the House to investigate the cause of such disturbance. At that time, the party of the first part did observe, with some degree of wonder and/or disbelief, a miniature sleigh (hereinafter the “Vehicle”) being pulled and/or drawn very rapidly through the air by approximately eight (8) reindeer. The driver of the Vehicle appeared to be and in fact was, the previously referenced Claus.

Said Claus was providing specific direction, instruction and guidance to the approximately eight (8) reindeer and specifically identified the animal co-conspirators by name: Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner and Blitzen (hereinafter the “Deer”). (Upon information and belief, it is further asserted that an additional co-conspirator named “Rudolph” may have been involved.)

The party of the first part witnessed Claus, the Vehicle and the Deer intentionally and willfully trespass upon the roofs of several residences located adjacent to and in the vicinity of the House, and noted that the Vehicle was heavily laden with packages, toys and other items of unknown origin or nature. Suddenly, without prior invitation or permission, either express or implied, the Vehicle arrived at the House, and Claus entered said House via the chimney.

Said Claus was clad in a red fur suit, which was partially covered with residue from the chimney, and he carried a large sack containing a portion of the aforementioned packages, toys, and other unknown items.

He was smoking what appeared to be tobacco in a small pipe in blatant violation of local ordinances and health regulations.

Claus did not speak, but immediately began to fill the stocking of the minor children, which hung adjacent to the chimney, with toys and other small gifts. (Said items did not, however, constitute “gifts” to said minor pursuant to the applicable provisions of the U.S. Tax Code.)

Upon completion of such task, Claus touched the side of his nose and flew, rose and/or ascended up the chimney of the House to the roof where the Vehicle and Deer waited and/or served as “lookouts.” Claus immediately departed for an unknown destination. However, prior to the departure of the Vehicle, Deer and Claus from said House, the party of the first part did hear Claus state and/or exclaim:

“Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!” or words to that effect.

Respectfully Submitted,

s./ The Grinch

Holiday Traditions

Christmas tree

Image via Wikipedia

This weekend we had our annual tree-trimming party with all of our friends.  It is a chance for all of us to have some cocktails and nibbles, and to enjoy each other’s company.

It started with just six of us, right after college (i.e. longer than we care to admit), and we have picked up many more friends along the way.  We now numbered thirty and that will no doubt still grow in the coming years.

One of our traditions (in addition to Jessie doing his infamous Bing Crosby imitation) is to exchange tree ornaments so that every year everyone has a brand new-looking tree.  And at the end of the night, I give everyone a popcorn ball to take home.  Not to store-bought kind but the gooey homemade kind.  It’s not the best or most expensive gift we give to our closest friends, but it is one that everyone knows comes from the heart.

This year, I “adopted” five troops serving in Afghanistan.  An email a week seems the least I can do for those half a world away from their families so that we can be safe here at home.  The holiday boxes I sent to them included the same popcorn balls I gave to friends here – a dozen to each instead of just one.  Needless to say, I am now the best friend of those five troops and all of their friends, too.  The warm and fuzzy feeling from the thank you notes will last long into the new year.

Do you have a holiday tradition – new or old – that you would like to share?  Inquiring minds would like to know!

My Favorite Holiday Movie

The holidays are a great time to sit with the family and watch a movie. I have many, many favorites but this one always reminds me that at this time of year no one wants to be alone, everyone gets a little wrapped up in themselves, someone tries hard not to be sad when their heart is breaking, and love is often found where you least expect it.

Love Actually – one of the new Christmas classics

 

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